” What is wrong with you?”
“You always embarrass me”
“You don’t care about me at all”
” Why can’t we have some normal conversation?”
” We are not normal”
” Is there something wrong with me?”
” Is there something wrong with you?”
” I feel guilty, like it’s all my fault”
” I hate you”
” Look at those parents, they are so supportive and caring”
” Why we don’t have what they have?”
” I should have never been born”
” I wish I could help you”
We’ve heard a lot about teenagers being more vulnerable to mental illness nowadays. #mentalhealthmatters is a worldwide used social media campaign.
People are raising their voices to end the mental health stigma that is, a global appeal to make talking about mental health normal. Large group of the volunteers include the age group of mid-teens, adolescents and young adults.
Where social media campaigns are working towards the mental health of children, the mental health of the parents is somewhere unintentionally neglected.
Mental illness doesn’t see age or gender. It can happen to anyone.
Very few children have parents with typical mental illness like schizophrenia or bipolar disorder etc. According to one study about 68% of women and 57% of men suffer from mental health issues like depression and anxiety disorder.
In this generation when people are lacking communication skills mental illness seems to extend its reach.
From the joint family culture, we are now in the nuclear family culture. Previously in joint family children were grown in an atmosphere where sharing was caring but, now the focus is growing more on making the children independent, this obsession with success is driving families apart.
We often hear that talking is a way by which mental health stigma reduces and there’s High possibility is that you will get better.
Talking to your trusted ones about your well-being is kind of a first aid of therapy.
But what about those kids whose parents are dealing with this illness as well.
Usually when people are unaware of their mental illness (here in most cases) people don’t like to talk about it even after diagnosis. This creates emotional distance from loved ones.
Parents are required to listen and help their children in any way possible. But what happens when the parents are struggling themselves?
How they’re supposed to parent their children when they need support themselves?
“Day 29, almost a month is over, and mamma hasn’t come out of her room yet. I prepare meals along with mine, but she barely eats anything. I’m terrified I don’t know what is happening she won’t talk to me or anybody and with dad gone I don’t know how to handle this.”
Have you ever felt that something is off with your parents?
They seem irritated all the time, distant from you, as if they don’t care, you haven’t seen them happy for ages, they seem exhausted and tired throughout the day.
While teens are getting aware about mental illness through social media campaigns.
They are stepping up and talking about mental health by destroying the stigmas associated with the same.
What about the parents they’re less likely to be on Instagram? How will they know about this disease?
As someone who has the information must extend it to the needy.
Here are some signs that show that your parent might be suffering:
- They are always irritated
They’ll get irritated at smallest of things and express themselves in various manners. From violent to isolating.
- They are irresponsive towards own children
Because of mental illness the patient tends to retract from daily routine because it’s overwhelming. Parents with mental illness struggle with taking care of children and this concludes in loosing connection with parents.
- Parenting behavior is not acceptable
Many parents with mental illness maybe violent and harsh with their children. Alcoholism and other highs can have irreplaceable effect on children.
- Sudden lag in child’s academia and daily routine
Children can’t be expected to do everything by themselves this is where parents come in. Parents teach children to deal with daily life problems. Being mentally ill can cause parents to neglect their role and child may end up growing faster than normal or with some troubled future.
- They seem exhausted and tired
They don’t want to do anything at all. They stay in bed all day or stare into infinity silently. The hopes and happiness seem to be gone.
- They try to avoid conversation
People with mental illness find it hard to talk about their disease. This lacks communication between the child and the parent which will again have adverse effect on the relations.
As we grow older, we are expected to be more responsible and understanding but that cannot happen until unless the person is mentally and physically fit.
Asking for help is the best decision for both personal recovery and well as proper growth of children.
Resources/ bibliography:
- https://www.yalemedicine.org/conditions/how-parental-depression-affects-child/
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4115390/
- https://youtu.be/uk9nHrlYF5U
- https://youtu.be/WGUheXxPavk
Image sources:
- https://www.yalemedicine.org/conditions/how-parental-depression-affects-child/
- https://in.pinterest.com/
Written by: Anunaya Tandon
Hi, my name is Anunaya Tandon and I am a psychology student at Banaras Hindu University, Varanasi. I have dealt with mental health issues previously, but I got better, and I am a firm believer that help is given if you ask for it. I also believe in the kindness in world. I shifted my academics from science to social science recently and I am still coping with this change, in all honesty it’s more fun than expected.
Can really relate the situation with the help of your examples. Good job👍
Thank you so much for reading 🥺✨